“Why is the boat not balanced?” my dragon boat captain asked. Sheepishly, I raised my hand. “I think it’s me—I’ve put on 4kg since starting my new job.”
Start with the people you naturally work with
Starting a new job always comes with adjustments. For me, that often includes a little weight gain. It’s not just stress eating; networking plays a role too. As an introvert, I’ve learned that meals are some of the best bonding tools. Instead of my usual routine—home-packed lunches or a midday gym session—I consciously choose to join my colleagues for meals. I’ve even wandered the office with a box of donuts, offering them to coworkers as an excuse to strike up conversations.
Networking as an introvert isn’t always natural, but it’s essential. Here’s how I turned those first awkward days at Mastercard into meaningful connections that set me up for success.
1. Don’t Squander Your First Introduction
Networking doesn’t begin on your first day. It starts even before you join. People will inevitably ask, “Where are you from?” or “Tell us about yourself.” These moments are your chance to make a strong impression.
I deliberately avoid introducing myself with just my title. In large organisations, titles can be vague or repetitive, and they rarely convey what you actually do. Instead of saying, “I’m a Lead Security and Monitoring Response Analyst,” I focus on a memorable aspect of my work.
When I first practiced this story, it wasn’t perfect—I stumbled over my words and buried the punchline. But with repetition, I honed it. I tested different versions with different audiences until I got it right. I knew I’d succeeded when someone gasped during my introduction and later approached me to learn more.
A strong introduction opens the door for deeper conversations down the line. Practice yours until it feels natural and impactful.
2. Use one-to-one conversations instead of trying to work the room
Once you’ve introduced yourself, the next step is turning those initial meetings into meaningful discussions. Early in my first month, I set a goal: every day, I’d schedule a one-on-one meeting with someone new. In a large organization, where people with the same title can do vastly different jobs, these conversations are invaluable.
But here’s the key: focus on them. I start every conversation by asking about their pain points. I learned this from observing a colleague who was a master at client relationships. Instead of pitching her product, she’d spend the first half of every meeting understanding the client’s challenges. By the end, the client often felt so supported they’d ask, “What’s in it for you?”
I applied this internally. For instance, when I needed intrusion data from another team, I didn’t frame it as a personal favor. Instead, I positioned it as an opportunity for them to showcase their insights in a global report read by government agencies. The report could enhance their visibility, justify additional resources, and even boost their budgets. When you align your ask with someone else’s goals, it’s a win-win.
3. Be an Interesting Conversationalist, give people a reason to speak to you again
Interesting conversations start with good questions. I learned this lesson at a dinner party when a friend started a conversation with a friend who is a property agent with this question, “How much is my flat worth?” The agent’s face fell—it felt like work. To salvage the conversation, I jumped in with, “Have you thought about selling commercial property?”
I’d picked up this random tidbit from chatting with another property agent: selling industrial properties like kopitiams and warehouses is more lucrative, though it requires learning a new set of jargon. This sparked a lively discussion, and the agent and I ended up talking late into the evening.
The lesson? People love talking about themselves, especially when they feel you’ve taken the time to understand their world. Even small snippets of knowledge, gathered from casual conversations, can transform interactions. So say hi in the elevator. Ask the taxi driver about their day. Be curious—you never know what you’ll learn.
4. Recognise you have something to give
Early in my career, I worried that I was constantly asking for favors without much to offer in return. Over time, I realized I had more to give than I thought. Giving doesn’t have to mean grand gestures—it can be as simple as sharing a relevant article, a podcast snippet, or introducing two people who might benefit from knowing each other.
For instance, I once helped an event planner working on a forum for unbanked tech solutions by sharing a story about Kenya’s M-Pesa system—a mobile money platform that transfers money to others via SMS. My connection to M-Pesa wasn’t just professional; it was personal. While traveling in Kenya, I learned how to use it to transfer money that I raised for a Kenyan university student to her, even though I was miles away from her. That insight helped the event planner craft a compelling angle for her newsletter, and we bonded over a shared interest in financial inclusion and creating impact.
Another time, I connected an aspiring family service officer with a friend who had worked in that field. My friend offered candid insights that no recruitment officer would share, giving the aspiring officer a clearer picture of the role.
It reminded me that what seems small to us—a story, a connection, a resource—can be transformational for someone else.
5. Build Genuine Relationships
Lastly, relationships flourish when they’re built on authenticity. To achieve this, I try to show vulnerability, share personal anecdotes, and express genuine appreciation.
For example, I once shared with a colleague how daunting it was to transition from government service to the corporate world. I admitted I was struggling to adapt to new metrics, like framing our work in terms of profit and loss instead of pure security outcomes. My openness resonated with her, and she later created a “newbie pack” of resources to help me navigate my new environment.
Small gestures matter, too. When meeting face-to-face, I bring snacks from my travels as a token of appreciation. After attending a well-curated forum, I made sure to email the organizer, thanking them for their thoughtful questions and seamless execution—and I cc’d their boss to ensure their efforts were
As Dale Carnegie said, “Praise is the nectar for the soul.” Feed people’s souls, and they’ll remember you.
Conclusion
Networking doesn’t have to be daunting, even for introverts. With a little preparation, curiosity, and generosity, you can turn every interaction into an opportunity to connect meaningfully.
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