GXS fired 10% of its staff in December 2025. Within 36 hours, two friends messaged me asking if I knew of openings for their friends who’d just been retrenched. Now imagine the other people from that same GXS layoff who don’t have this. They’re facing the exact same job market, but they’ll be doing it alone, scrolling job boards by themselves, cold messaging strangers on LinkedIn, starting from zero.
So if you got retrenched tomorrow, who’s texting their contacts for you? If your answer is “honestly, I don’t know,” you’re already on the back foot. Read on to find out why having a friend bat for you is game-changing when you’re job hunting, and how to build that network today.
Build relationships before you need to ask for help
First, when your friend asks on your behalf, you don’t look desperate. Instead, you look exceptional. Imagine you receive a message from a stranger cold-emailing you: “Do you have a job available?”, you would probably think twice of helping them and think they sound desperate. But if their friend reaches out instead saying “Hey, my friend just lost their job, he’s in CTI, any openings?” I’d be surprised if you didn’t think “Wow, this person must be really good. Otherwise why would their friend spend time spreading the word and risk their own reputation asking on their behalf?”
Second, you get access to the hidden job market. Some 70 per cent of jobs aren’t advertised publicly, either accessible only within companies’ internal networks or designed for candidates discovered through headhunting and networking. But when your friends are looking for you, you get access to jobs through their networks that you’d never find on your own. Furthermore, you can tap on the same chain to get a referral. Referred candidates are more than 10 times more likely to get interviews and about 4–7 times more likely to be hired than non-referred candidates.
Third, your friends start working before you’re even ready. In this GXS case, the laid-off workers aren’t even ready to job hunt yet. They’re still processing what happened, maybe taking a few days to decompress. But their prayer chains have already been activated. By the time they’re ready to start looking, their friends have already surfaced options for them. They’re not starting from zero, they’re starting with warm leads.
Build a “prayer chain” network that you can activate when you need them
You build it now, before you need it. While you’re employed, while you’re not desperate, while you can actually be useful to other people. Christmas parties are happening right now. Show up, have real conversations, offer to help people where you can.
I put together a networking guide on how to build relationships before you need them, maintain your network without being annoying, and activate it if you’re already job hunting. It’s nothing fancy, just tactics from my earlier posts pulled into one place. Keep it, send it to a friend who needs it, or share it with your students.
Hopefully by the new year when you ask yourself this question again, the answer to “who’s texting their contacts for you” won’t be “nobody.”
Make your work visible outside your employer through networking
How to Introduce Yourself?
- Don’t lead with your job title. At my first event, I said I was “Mastercard’s Lead Security and Monitoring Analyst.” Eyes glazed over. Now I say: “I left government after realizing I had 900 months left to live and didn’t want to spend them doing work I couldn’t talk about at dinner parties.” That starts real conversations.
How to Break Into Conversations?
- Prepare conversation starters for key people based on research. Once I had to search for a conversation opener on the fly when one of my big bosses decided to join me for breakfast at a conference. While he was getting his food, I quickly pulled up his LinkedIn. Turns out he’d been up posting at 6am. So when he sat down, I said “You’ve been up early, posting on LinkedIn.” He cocked his eyebrow. I admitted I’d seen his post. He laughed and said he had jetlag. We talked about our morning routines, went on to family, entirely skipped work talk, and walked away having traded personal stories.
- Wear a “WHAZZIT”. Something that invites questions. A unique pin, an unusual watch, a conference badge from somewhere interesting. I usually hate dresses, but wearing one that reminded people of the Singapore Airlines sarong kebaya drew strangers in. I’ve had people come up to me and say: “I’ve been admiring your dress for the last two days!” For introverts, this works like magic. It pulls people to you instead of forcing you to awkwardly shove yourself into a conversation.
- Ask a question, even if it’s not “smart”. I stumbled on this trick by accident. Two people were pointing at the aircon and I went up to them and ask, “Should I get the building manager to turn down the temperature?” They laughed and said, “Nope! We’re from Surbana Jurong, discussing infrastructure automation.” My totally wrong guess? Perfect icebreaker. I pivoted to recent projects I’d read about Surbana Jurong, and just like that, I was in the conversation.
- Praise someone genuinely. After one event, a woman came up and said, “You did such a great job emceeing! I work in cyber scam education, and I can spot a good storyteller. You kept everyone hooked.” That compliment led to a conversation about how she entered scam education after her mom got scammed, and suddenly we were having a real, engaging discussion.
Where to Take the Conversation?
- Find one real point of connection through disclosure or vulnerability. My property agent noticed my dragon boat paddle and mentioned he used to row. Suddenly he wasn’t just an agent, he was a fellow rower. When he said my asking price ($950k) was unrealistic, I trusted him immediately and accepted $850k. He closed faster, I got my apartment. We are friends now and I still recommend him to my friends.
How to Exit?
- Acknowledge value, give a reason, create continuity. At a Bangkok police conference, I had 30 minutes during tea breaks. I targeted Southeast Asian officers, got the connections I needed, then said “This was incredibly helpful, I want to catch [name] before they go/ I need the washroom/ I want to get more food. Let’s connect on LinkedIn?”
How to follow up?
- Warm your network every 6-8 weeks with no ask. I met a Brazilian police officer at work. Three months later, I texted him a Singapore fraud case study. Six months after that, he invited me to speak at their workshop. I never asked for anything, just stayed visible.
How to network from home?
- Ask a stranger why he connected with you on LinkedIn. Someone messaged me: “Thanks for connecting. Have we met, or was there something about my profile that caught your eye?” That one line turned a cold add into a real conversation, all while I was home in pyjamas.
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